Friday, January 7, 2011

Preparation or Disappointment

Since August when we made the decision to pursue the Foreign Service, my spare time has been diligently used to read numerous blog written by FS trailing spouses, read books covering the subject or simply thinking about what I need to do to prepare.

The Foreign Service is constantly in my thoughts right now.  I could be bathing my children and think about how I would like to purchase new linens to take with us.  It has effected the way I purchase things, which this could be for the good.  I don't want to make anymore major purchases or anything for the house for the simple thought that if we are moving to a another country do I really want to take this with me. Olivia is needing a new bed this year.  She has nearly outgrown her toddler bed.  But I don't want to purchase a bedroom set when there should be one provided with housing.  I will purchase bedding but then I think what if my girls end up sharing a room, should I purchase a matching set for Lucy?

This behavior is very typical for me.  I love to plan and prepare and too often I get myself caught up in a life that may not be.  And when that comes to a realization, in this case it could be Eduardo not passing the test or they may not like him at the interview, it will be a severe disappointment to me.  A disappointment that will practically immobilize me for weeks.

Perhaps it is having something to look forward to (travel, learning a new language, experiencing new cultures) that causes me to act the way I do.  I simply can't help it!

I am not counting on the FS being the life for us, but I certainly hope it is.

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