Since we moved I've been feeling even more inadequacy than usual. I've moved to a place filled with wonderful people. The odd thing is that there is a greater percentage of women here who have served missions and have collage degrees than any other place I've lived before. There are seriously only a few people that I've talked to that haven't served a mission. Ed has even noticed this. I really dislike when they ask me where I served or what my degree is in because I didn't do either.
Back in High School I had tons of plans. I remember being interviewed for the yearbook to document just what I was going to do. I was going to attend a University in Europe (I was either going to head to Germany or France). I was to studying International Business with a minor in a language (French or German). I was going to work for a large European corporation and be successful. These plans didn't work out. Shortly after graduating from school my dad became very ill and my older siblings and I had medical power of attorney so I had to stay and help him.
Shortly after, I got married to the most wonderful man in the world. I decision that I am VERY happy about! I attend collage continued to attend until I got very sick. I just couldn't continue that semester so I withdrew and never went back. We decided it was best for me to work and Ed to go to school.
While Ed was attending the university I would think of the different degrees that I wanted to go back to get. I've thought about History or Elementary Education and several others that I can't remember now.
When Ed graduated with his bachelors degree, it still wasn't time for me to go back. I had a new baby (my sweet Olivia) and she was to be my focus. Years have gone by and I still haven't gone back to school. Ed is now doing his Masters degree. I don't know when it will be time for me to go back or even what I would study.
Honestly I am terrified of going back and doing homework. I am afraid of failure. I really have no intention of getting a degree to use and perhaps that has a lot to do with my lack of motivation. I LOVE being a stay-at-home-mom. I could never picture myself as the big corporate woman that I once wanted to be. Even when my children head off to school, I want to be home. I want to be at their cross roads.
I am doing the MOST important job in the world and certainly one of the hardest jobs I've ever had. Someday Ed and I will serve missions. That is actually one reason why he's gone back to school. He wants a career that will bring in some money and it's not for us to be wealthy. The money is for our future missionS, our children's collage educations and to give.
I don't know if I will ever complete my goals of learning another language, graduating with a Bachelors degree but I do know that I will work hard in the path that I've been given. I have things to learn from these wonderful women around me and hopefully I have something to give back to them. Hey, Ed and I do hold the ward title for being the longest married by 3 1/2 years.
Just my thoughts today.
Back in High School I had tons of plans. I remember being interviewed for the yearbook to document just what I was going to do. I was going to attend a University in Europe (I was either going to head to Germany or France). I was to studying International Business with a minor in a language (French or German). I was going to work for a large European corporation and be successful. These plans didn't work out. Shortly after graduating from school my dad became very ill and my older siblings and I had medical power of attorney so I had to stay and help him.
Shortly after, I got married to the most wonderful man in the world. I decision that I am VERY happy about! I attend collage continued to attend until I got very sick. I just couldn't continue that semester so I withdrew and never went back. We decided it was best for me to work and Ed to go to school.
While Ed was attending the university I would think of the different degrees that I wanted to go back to get. I've thought about History or Elementary Education and several others that I can't remember now.
When Ed graduated with his bachelors degree, it still wasn't time for me to go back. I had a new baby (my sweet Olivia) and she was to be my focus. Years have gone by and I still haven't gone back to school. Ed is now doing his Masters degree. I don't know when it will be time for me to go back or even what I would study.
Honestly I am terrified of going back and doing homework. I am afraid of failure. I really have no intention of getting a degree to use and perhaps that has a lot to do with my lack of motivation. I LOVE being a stay-at-home-mom. I could never picture myself as the big corporate woman that I once wanted to be. Even when my children head off to school, I want to be home. I want to be at their cross roads.
I am doing the MOST important job in the world and certainly one of the hardest jobs I've ever had. Someday Ed and I will serve missions. That is actually one reason why he's gone back to school. He wants a career that will bring in some money and it's not for us to be wealthy. The money is for our future missionS, our children's collage educations and to give.
I don't know if I will ever complete my goals of learning another language, graduating with a Bachelors degree but I do know that I will work hard in the path that I've been given. I have things to learn from these wonderful women around me and hopefully I have something to give back to them. Hey, Ed and I do hold the ward title for being the longest married by 3 1/2 years.
Just my thoughts today.
