My Life Focuses

For several years now I have felt that if I have 3 minutes left in my day then it is plenty of time to do one more project or be involved in one more activity.  I love feeling productive and at the end of the day have a sense of accomplishment.  After a VERY difficult pregnancy and severe postpartum depression I knew that I needed to simplify.  My husband would tell me that there just isn't enough time in the day to do everything.  In the back of my mind I would think that soon enough I would be back to my old self and dabble in a little of everything.  Isn't that what it means to be a well-rounded person?

As things continued to fall apart in my life I knew that something had to change.  It quickly came to point of me doing nothing simply because I couldn't handle doing anything.  A year has passed from this point and things have changed for the good in my life.  I have finally been able to over come the postpartum (Lucy is now 2 1/2) and feel that I can do things again.

I don't want to do a little of everything again.  I realize now how thin I was stretched and how little time I gave the truly important things.  I decided to evaluate myself and decide what things truly bring me happiness and pleasure and make those my focus.  I want to be really good at a few things than experience a little of everything and never 'master' anything.

So My Life Focus:

1- Teach My Children
2- Gardening
3- Family History
4- Healthy Lifestyle (not something I really enjoy but something that I need to learn to do)
5- Organized and Maintained House.

I have set an ultimate goal for each one and then smaller goals on how I think I may accomplish this.  This is not something that I will achieve in one year but hopefully over a life time.  Naturally my love for somethings may change but hopefully I've been able to have a level of success that can be shared with others.

An Update of Sorts

I have thoughts about blogging, but I can't seem to find a moment of clear thought to do it. Life hasn't exactly been perfect now. I am attempting to function most days on only 2 to 4 hours of sleep. After pregnancy and waking several times in the night to a 4 month old baby that doesn't let me sleep, I am a zombie. I am lucky to remember to brush my teeth. (Honestly there have been a few times where I am driving somewhere and realize just that, I forgot to brush. Thank goodness for gum until I get home!)

At this exact moment I am listening to my baby "cry it out". After a horrible night where she needed me to sooth her back to sleep every 30 to 45 minutes, I decided it's time to truly sleep train her. A few weeks ago a let her cry herself asleep with a nap and for a while nap time was great. Bedtime wasn't so great for the mere fact that I nurse her before laying her down. By the time she's finished eating she is asleep and therefore thinks she needs to nurse to sleep. Tonight after a bowl of rice cereal with pears and a warm lavender bath, I sent her to bed without nursing. It hurts listening to her cry out for me, needing me to sooth her. I keep telling myself that this will last only a short time and we will both be happier in the long run. I hope it's true!

Lucy hates solids! Don't let that cute picture of her after her first bowl of rice cereal fool you. Every day no matter what foods I introduce to her (new or old) she pulls such faces that I can only interpret as "what are you doing to me!" and "But Mom, this isn't you!" I can't believe how different Lucy is from Olivia.

(There has been several moments of silence after listening to screaming for 41 minutes. Please let her be asleep and stay asleep! )

In good news, I have tried very hard to stay true to my commitment to workout and eat better. It's paying off! Today at church I had at least 3 people stop me and tell me that I was looking really good. That feels great! But what is even better is that today I wore a size 8 to church. I was beaming inside from the thought that almost my entire wardrobe has opened up to me again. I have lost all of the pregnancy weight and met that first mini goal a few weeks ago. I'm working on losing the weight I gained from my move a little over a year ago. I know I can do it!

My sweet husband has painted one of the bedrooms downstairs for my craft room and I started to move into it yesterday. I can't wait to have it set up so I can explore my creative side. It's been too long since I've been able to. The only hard thing now is trying to organize everything. I am turning to my decoration and organizing ideas for some inspiration. It will be a while until I have it up and running. I need a few good nights of sleep (because that is where I tend to think of design) and hope to get a certain sewing table that I regret giving away 6 years ago to really make a wonderful craft room.

My other goals that I have set for the year are not going as strong as I would like, but I think the sleep or lack thereof has something to do about that. I still sit down every Sunday and think of what things can I work on this coming week. I have made several new good habits and hope to do more.

Honestly what everything boils down to is me getting enough sleep. I don't mind getting up once or even twice at this point (in the future I look forward to not getting up at all!). I know once I am getting more sleep and perhaps caught up on missing sleep, I can start to work on the HUGE list of projects I have and begin on the thoughts swimming in my head. I like to be busy and at the end of the day I like to have accomplished something.

Hopefully soon Lucy will allow this to be a reality and I can share with you some of the things I am dreaming of doing.

Just a note to end, Lucy did indeed stop crying after 41 minutes and I have hopes that this will lead to a better night. If not tonight then one very soon!

Relfecting on 2009, Looking ahead to 2010

A few weeks ago I came across my goals that I set for myself this year and was taken back by how much and how little I did. 2009 really has been a rough year for me. Most too personal to share here, but with the amount of stress I honestly feel I lost the entire year. Yes, there has been some good like my beautiful new Lucy and many new friends! I have much to be grateful for such as the opportunity to be a full stay-at-home-mom, something I wanted for years. I have a beautiful house and a wonderful family.

After a stressful year, more realistic is a stressful 18 months with the move, I am ready to finally settle into my house, get back to my routines & schedules, and try to be a better me.

First, a look back to the goals I set for this year and how I actually did.

1. Lose the weight I gained during the move. Failed, but not entirely on purpose. I had a beautiful baby in October and that means there is weight gain.

2. Cook More. I did well at this for a few months and then failed. Being a zombie during pregnancy followed with bed rest didn't help me any.

3. Potty train Livy. Completed twice! During the end of my pregnancy Livy completed reverted back to diapers. She has done super for several weeks and we are well on our way!

4. Spend less time in front of the computer. Failed again, but not much else to do while on bed rest. Now it's even a harder habit to break but I will!

5. Get our Food Storage. We certainly have added to it with some home canning and other great deals.

What do I want to get out of the new year? I want to look back and feel that I did something, even if very small, that improved me. Something that helped me be a better person.

The biggest goal is to get back into my routines that I pushed aside while pregnant. How ever simple these may be, I want better habits for myself and my family.

I have actually spent months on figuring out what I want to accomplish. (I know "months" may seem extreme, but that was one thing I did while on bed rest.) I thought of the little things that are not working in my day-to-day life, how I wanted to improve as a wife & mother, and what I wanted to work on for me.

Somethings are simply too personal to share here. What it boils down to is that I want to become more what this blog is titled, Classy. Becoming a little more classy can be several things from being more organized, taking care of myself, being a better mother and accomplishing long overdue projects.

A few things that I want to work on in 2010:

• Take better care of myself! I let so much slide while pregnant and on bed rest. It's time to treat myself better. This includes exercise more, making healthier meals, and never going to bed with make-up on. (I am guilty!)
• Use better etiquette. I'm fairly good with this, but there is always room for improvement.
• Have nicer meals together as a family. Actually set the table! In the past year dinnertime seams to be too rushed and I have slacked on the simple things.
• Limit computer time. I need to focus more on my children and not on facebook or blogs. In a schedule I have created for myself, there will be limited time for these things. I will still have connections to the outside world and fulfill my duties.
• Bake something new every month. If you know me, I truly do not like to cook. I am hoping that if I try out a new recipe or technique that perhaps I will start to enjoy it more. Plus this could be helpful for my next goal.
• Entertain more. I said that I would do that this past year and hosted a few dinner parties, but that wasn't enough for me. I would like to invite someone over every month for at least dessert.
• Organize the entire house. This one is a little lofty, but I want to at least go through every room once during the year and make sure it's functioning for it's purpose. I have boxes to sort through from the move (over a year ago!) and I want to find something that is lost and treasured.
• Plant a veggie garden. I planted one last year that was taken over by weeds. I should know from my first pregnancy and completely killing that garden too that I can not have a garden while pregnant. This year I want to try square-foot gardening.
• Preschool with Livy. I purchased activities right before I became pregnant and failed at doing much with her.

There are so many more things that I want to accomplish in the New Year. I am hoping that as I work on various goals that I can post them here. Perhaps I way of checking in on myself to stay on track. There will be somethings that I don't post about and other things that are not listed above. Like I said, my list is rather lengthy. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Many of the things are rather small so perhaps it's good.

My wish for you is a New Year filled with all that you love! May happiness and good luck find you!

Happy New Year!