Learning to Juggle

I was never interested in learning to juggle. I enjoyed watching jugglers at the circus, county fair, or when they came to our class in elementary school; but it wasn't something that I HAD to learn. I have a mental list of things that I would love to learn, try or do. Juggling is not on it.

Now I wish that I could juggle. Not necessarily balls, pins, or rolled up socks, but life! Since I had Olivia, I have been struggling to find a balance where I can be wife, mother, all of the other titles that I have, and still be me. There are so many things that I am involved in or want to be in, that I am simply having a hard time keeping it all put together.

I am a counselor in the Relief Society Presidency so with that alone I am busy. This takes up every Sunday and most Tuesday evenings.

I do Jazzercise 3 to 4 times a week at the community center. I really feel that it is important that I do some "me" things. Plus I love that fact that I have lost all of the baby weight plus an additional 20 pounds. I want to keep that off. I am also doing this to set a good example for Olivia. If she sees me being active then she will be active too.

I have been (will officially happen tonight) nominated as Captain of our DUP camp. I love getting involved in things, and this shouldn't take too much time, but it is still a little overwhelming that I will be in charge.

I am also involved in DAR but have not been nominated to any committees (this could change).

But the part that I am mentally struggling with is several groups that I have put together at church. There are other people in charge, thankfully, but they are classes and groups that I want to be involved in. There is cooking, arts/crafts, A Girls Night Out, Gardening, Book and a Play Group. I want to be able to go to these, but most of them conflict with Relief Society Presidency Meetings or DUP meetings. The only one that I will be able to participate in will be the Play Group because that is during the day.

Those are the things that I am juggling in the evenings. During the day I am trying to be a good mom to Olivia, provider to the daycare kids, and wife to Eduardo. There is only so much time to clean, cook and dance around or roll on the floor (her new fav. when we play) with Olivia.

To make things worse, and it really shouldn't, next week Eduardo will start his new job and that means that he will be home in the evenings. Since we were married, he has always had a job where he works in the evenings, getting home around 10 or 11pm. Don't get me wrong, I am excited that I will have him home in the evenings. We can actually be a family, have dinners together and go to bed at a decent time. But I am afraid that I will feel guilty about going to Jazzercise, meetings, and fun groups when I should be at home.

I am home all day and I need an out. I know that something has to give. I don't want to give anything up. Can't we simply add a few more days to week (naturally non work days) and a few more hours to each day? I know that would solve my problems!